How to Stop Choosing the Wrong Person Over and Over and Be Happy

Did you just have to break up with another total loser and are you wondering how to stop choosing the wrong person over and over so that you can, once and for all, be happy?

It happens to all of us. We so want to find the person we will love forever and yet we repeatedly choose someone who not only isn’t good for us but who is often JUST like the person we dated last time.

Seems silly, right? It is but it is very common. Luckily, you can stop this tendency in its tracks with a little bit of awareness and action.

#1 — Know what you want.

You know when you go shopping for a car or a new house, you have some idea of what you want. Automatic or standard? Red or Black? Ranch or Cape? City or suburbs? Either way, you head into one of the biggest decisions of your life knowing what you want.

Of course, we can’t always get exactly what we want, and sometimes what we want ends up being different from what we thought we wanted, but knowing mostly what we are looking for at the outset is important.

People always say they want someone who is attractive, funny, intelligent, financially secure etc. What I always encourage people to look at, however, is how they want their person to make them FEEL.

For example: instead of someone being attractive, someone who makes me smile when I see them. Instead of someone being funny, someone who makes me laugh out loud. Someone who is financially secure meaning someone who makes me feel safe.

Knowing how you want someone to make you feel is way more important than looking for specific traits in someone. You know that guy who is HOT and then he opens his mouth and what comes out makes you want to run for the hills? That is what I mean.

As you work to stop choosing the wrong person over and over, take stock of what it is you want, how you want your forever person to make you feel.

#2 — Look hard at your past.

Okay, this part is really important. You know the phrase ‘history repeats itself?’ It does, in more ways than one.